A meaningless Bills game in December?? That means Christmas is almost here!!!!!
Last week our beloved (in September - November) Buffalo Bills took it to the even more-so dysfunctional Jacksonville Jaguars in front of a crowd of 147 at Ralph Wilson Stadium. Seriously, my Albanian friend Tom's wedding to a Lebanese girl had more people at it (also, a belly dancer, but that's a conversation for different day). The Bills played well in almost every facet of the game, and I had a pretty nice time drinking a few beers and watching it without a care in the world. Until, of course as I mentioned last week, when I realized the win just pushes them further towards mediocrity and the 15th pick overall. Ugh, why can't they just "Billose" and let me get on with my life? (I just copyrighted that so back the fuck off.)
I think the Continental handled that question well in her mailbag yesterday, but honestly I still don't know what to do anymore. Just like Office Mac explaining his second rendezvous with crabs, we've been here before haven't we? I sort of care about the games, but when all my non-Buffalo friends have teams with solid playoff aspirations, it just stings too much to still be that die-hard fan that mouth-breathers with Bills tattoos think you should be. The Bills are not fuckin' Rudy here folks, they're Giovanni Ribisi in The Other Sister; trying to take pride in what they do but failing miserably at it while making the people watching feel uncomfortable.
I'm keeping it short this week because I literally have an hour to knock this out and I probably won't edit it either. Join me on this illiterate journey, won't you?